Saturday, March 30, 2013

At The Cross...

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Thursday evening the children and I put our names on the cross. It was a symbolization of our sins being nailed to the cross and covered by the blood of Jesus to wash away our sins. My son did one for my husband and I put it on the cross and said a little prayer to cover our family and forgive us for our sins as well as to thank God for sending His son to die for our sins. Then last night we went to Good Friday service at our church and took communion at the end. Although, my husband was not there I prayed to God and said because we are "one flesh" I would stand and represent us both so once again I said a prayer asking God to forgive us of our sins and thanking Him for the great sacrifice. I prayed that God would give us a heart like His and that we would draw closer to Him. In that moment I felt something so serene and beautiful and for the first time communion meant something so much greater to me than ever before.

God has brought me so far and my family so far and although we have not reached our final destination I thank God for the ultimate sacrifice He gave through Christ. Every time I see what I lost and the tears begin to form I remember look how far I've come and look how much I have gained? God has done something in me that is greater than any gift or talent He could have ever given me. He gave me LOVE! No matter how many times I failed Him, He never stopped loving me. No matter how many times I disappointed Him I was loved. Even while in disobedience God gave me His mercy, His grace, but most of all His unwavering love! God's love NEVER fails even when I fail!!!! I am so grateful He took the time out to teach me how to love. He worked through my anger, my bitterness, my hate, my rage, my depression, my suicidal thoughts and He reached down and smiled on me as if I wasn't these broken pieces but I was perfectly whole in His eyes. God loved me even before I walked into the woman He called me to be! I am forever thankful for that kind of love and that kind of God. This is proof that there is purpose for my pain and none of it has been in vain because look at who I am today. =) I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am trusting the process even though I don't know the plans....

Blog with you later **huggies**

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